So. A couple of weeks into this idea and suddenly THE GREATEST VICTORY OF ALL TIME™ has taken place. I didn’t see the game (obviously) but have felt the reaction to it on the internet and caught the story by inadvertently glancing at the back pages. I commented on Twitter that I seemed to have missed a great game.
There were three very different responses to my tweeting about it.
Firstly some people seem to be in some way trying to be sympathetic. I’m getting the same looks I got when I left the vets once, alone and holding my dog’s lead and collar – I must have looked a little upset as a kind old lady grabbed my hand and whispered “It’s ok – I’m sure doggie heaven will have it’s gates open for yours”. I just smiled thanked this stranger for her kindness and walked away proud I hadn’t said what was on the tip of my tongue “Well they won’t need to open the gates love, she’s being spayed, I’m sure we could post her womb through St. Peter’s letterbox”. Thanks but honestly I’m not after sympathy, I’m not ill, I’ve not lost anything – except my mind it seems to some people – these are the second group of people.
The second group of people aren’t in the majority but they seem to shout the loudest. These tweets usually have a passive aggressive element. “I bet you are missing it now aren’t you DICKHEAD”, “Ha! -thought you weren’t liking football anymore you BENDER” (yes ‘bender’ really – and yes unfriended) and such. OF COURSE I am missing it at the moment, but please don’t call me names or revert to misplaced and frankly ludicrous homophobia, I’m just trying something, you know, just to see if it works out. Why don’t you try just being nice or in the case of the second ex-facebook friend stop using the language of The Sun in the days of “EastBenders” headlines. It’s not like I’m making anyone else do it, nor am I saying people watching football are in way wrong – you aren’t, in fact I was just like you until a few weeks ago until I opened my big fat stupid mouth, and next thing you know Old Jed’s a millionaire and I’m not watching football for a year. A game I love and yes I’m missing. Am I regretting it? No. I’m still very much into the idea of conducting the experiment. I’m sure/hoping/desperate that some good will come of it.
Thirdly there are those that seem to think they have caught me in some kind of trap as I reflect on the score. I can almost hear the harrumph as they type “How do you know?” etc. Well let me tell you – if there is one lesson I have learned so far in this thing is that I can’t completely avoid it. I don’t know if it is my circle of friends (in real life and online) or the world in general. I just can’t seem to be unaware of what is going on. It’s also difficult to hide the delight of my 14 year old son, who looked like he’d been asked to be a security guard for the female dressings rooms on the next Inbetweeners movie as he came back from watching the game.
That said the only details I know are that of the score and the general delight/malaise of my friends who happen to be Man United fans of those of Arsenal.
So on we go, enjoy your football, don’t be a hater and don’t feel any sympathy for me. It’s my fault.