Apologies to any comedians who might read this, you know this already.
I’ve had one of those very funny weekends where lots of people have spoken to me after the gig(s) and said things that I find surprising, sometimes astonishing and very rarely but still a few times a year – insulting.
I don’t know what happened this weekend, maybe there was something in the air, maybe I was more ‘approachable’. Perhaps because I was compering rather than doing a set meant I was around after every show and not dashing to do another or going home or going to the bar.
Here’s a list of things people can say after a gig where you think, hang on, that’s not right.
1. You were the funniest.
In front of your mate(s) who were also on. (In your head you agree, but you have to at least ‘appear’ modest’)
2. He was the funniest – pointing to another act.
He wasn’t but you have to shrug and agree
3. When compering – why don’t you do the stand-up, you might be good at it? Try it.
4. You love the heckles don’t you – it gives you material doesn’t it?
No it doesn’t. Ever.
5. How much do you get for doing that?
Sometimes wide-eyed curious, sometimes with an edge that says, I feel ripped off.
6. What do you do for a full time job – you know during the week?
Ouch.
7. Who writes your stuff?
Ouch harder.
8. Can I have a picture?
No problem it’s always a delight to meet ‘my public’
9. Can I have a picture – no I mean, can you take it, of me and my friends?
Cringetastic. Especially as they laugh hard in your face.
10. Can I tell you a joke? There’s this black fella…..
woah easy tiger. Let’s stop it right there.